It came to my attention, after a very strange emotional outburst of epic proportions, that I am not currently fulfilled by just doing hair.
I have always been an educator, using my knowledge to help other hairdressers grow and develop. I went through Life Coaching certification to help spread the magic life has for us. Man, was I on fire!!!!!!! I mean, I was 31 and had it all figured out. I get to spend the rest of my life sprinkling fairy dust.
Then, the day I signed on my first client, 2 1/2 years ago, a car pulled out in front of me and I had no choice but to hit them. I was surprised. Then, exactly a month later, the same date as the first one, the 21st, a car hits me. WHAT???????
After that…….. everything crumbled. Well, at least thats what it felt like. I was left without much to give. I focused on working behind the chair because thats what paid the bills and had to step away from coaching, teaching and healing. I was in so much pain, I didn’t have any room or any energy to help others. I mean, I was the victim here, so I was the one who needed all the attention! Oh man, did I get stuck in that really horrible place………for two years. I stopped showing up, I started to hide, I almost completely went into hiding actually. Lucky for me I can’t, its almost impossible to do that when you’re a hairdresser. I spent a lot of time feeling sad for myself and tons of time being angry and confused. I would be cutting someones hair and feel pain and start to become angry. I’m in so much pain and this person is worried about cutting more than an inch? I went to therapy and worked through so much of the emotional trauma, I almost felt whole again………….almost. After about 6 months of feeling good and settling my case with the insurance company, something happened. I became restless, I finally had something to give and it was all bottled up ready to explode.
So, here I am………..back from the depths of fear, anger, sadness, self loathing, extreme isolation and everything yucky. I found my center, I returned to my body. I had to sit in my body………..give her a hug, tell her she is so brave and so strong. I had to rub her back and tell her how beautiful she is and how proud of her I am.
We have everything we need, we are all full of gifts, magic and sparkly things. I am ready to help others find all the sparkly things and the love they have inside, ready to flow.
AuthenticallyME,
Marci
authenticallyBE 